August 29, 2005
Please make John Madden go away…
I think JimmyJ and Wilson are with me on this one. John Madden needs to go away. He’s universally hated by every football fan with an IQ over 80. Tonight it went too far.
I was watching Monday Night Football, Rams vs. Lions. The QB for the Lions, Joey Harrington, drops back to pass. As his blocking was piss-poor all night, he pulls the ball back to pass and gets blind-sided by the defensive end, Anthony Hargrove. The ball flies forward 5-6 yards, bounces off an offensive lineman, and is picked up by the Rams as a fumble. Not surprisingly, this triggers a challenge by the Lions.
All this is normal. And then the commentary starts. Madden thinks it’s a fumble. Al Michaels isn’t so sure. So what does he do? He asks John Madden to explain how it happened in physics terms! Now, I don’t know as much about cross-country bus travel as John Madden does, but I guarantee I know far more about physics. And everything he said was wrong. He starts tossing out terms like inertia and momentum, not where they actually made any sense, but tried to sound like he had a clue. As usual, he didn’t. The ball was obviously an incomplete pass, and Madden’s analysis was all wrong. The call on field was overturned.
John Madden, although he might have a few catchphrases, has very little more. I don’t doubt that he occasionally says something that turns out to be correct, but you need to be better than 20% to warrant keeping a job. I find myself thinking back fondly of the days of Dennis Miller. Dennis may not have known all that much about football, but at least he could utter multi-syllable words.
Anyone else have any good horrible stories about John Madden?
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In a tradition started by my father, and continuing to this day, whenever Madden calls a game I mute the TV and tune in the radio or pull an internet broadcast.